Really? Why Don't You Prove It?

“So Ikea??” Yep. That was how it started. Athena wanted to know all about my trip to Ikea with the Joker (although I’m not exactly sure why...) and apparently there are “SIGNS”. Yes. Signs. Signs that I am refusing to see because I am doing really well on this whole thing where I convince myself that it’s never, EVER going to happen and now she tells me the whole thing is full of tell-tale signs that prove otherwise. Oh great.

Pillow fight. “You went without me?!!” Spending time together outside of work. Banter. Talking about non-work things.

Apparently, these are all signs and I plan on ignoring them all. Why, you ask? Because it’s just not fair. It’s not fair. I liked him and it wasn’t mutual. This is a race I can’t win on endurance and no matter how long I sit around and wait, it ain’t gonna happen. So now he decides there are some “signs” he’s ready to put out? Well I don’t want your fucking signs now. I finally was able to convince myself that it wasn’t going to happen and we were going to be BFF’s (sorry, I should have warned you about the puke bucket moment!) and he can’t just waltz in here and start like that. NO! I won’t have it!

The Joker: if you want to start throwing these signs around, you better be ready. I’m not just going to let you in and fall under that smile spell of yours. It won’t happen that way, but if you are going to start that way, well I suggest you best be ready. I don’t know what I’m going to do, but you better get your game face on. After all that time I’ve spent hoping, well, maybe it’s time the tables are turned.

Everything At Once

When I got home Friday, I curled into a ball and wept like a baby on my bedroom floor. You know those scenes you see in movies where everything that could possibly go wrong has, and the character has no other option but cry? Oh yeah; THAT was my Friday. ‘Twas the day everything came to a head and I couldn’t handle it anymore and trust me, I can handle a lot of crap.

Friday morning, I e-mailed Athena about the comment Mrs. O had made about the Joker’s face lighting up when he sees me. She tells me that it’s a race I can’t win on endurance and he wants someone like KH and when he can’t have her, I’m the ego boost for this parasite. She told me to get my head out of my ass and face reality. When I told her that I knew all of that, she told me not to lie to her and stop crushing on him.

The Joker and I are friends. I know this. We will never be more than friends. I know this. He does not want me. I KNOW THIS!! Thanks for making me feel about two inches tall. I shouldn’t have to defend my friendship with the Joker to anyone. After the accident, he calmed me down like no one else can. He understands me and knows when I need space or when I need a fricken hug! We are friends. I want to be his friend. That’s what I am. I am not lying. Why do people have to assume more?!

I called the body shop on Friday to find out when I could go about getting a rental car since I knew Jack was going to be in the shop for a while. The secretary told me that she had just talked to my Dad who told them I didn’t need one. Excuse me? Who is my Dad to tell them whether or not I need a rental car? What part of “let me do this on my own and please stay out of it” is confusing to you? My dad told me after work on Friday that there is $4,900 worth of damage to my truck. OMG. I caused $4,900 worth of damage to my Jack.

This whole homework thing, I’m still not used to. I had a homework assignment due Friday at midnight like every other week and I submitted it on Thursday. Since it’s an online course, they let you do the assignment as many times as you want to before the due date. On Thursday, my mark was like 85% or something and I was going to do it again after work on Friday, but I ran out of time. I tend to get very disappointed in myself easily, especially when I know that I could’ve done so much better on that assignment.

I guess Friday was one of those days where everything seemed to come at me all at once: Athena smacking some sense into me; having to defend and seriously evaluate my relationship with the Joker; my Dad butting into my life when I just want him to let me deal with this on my own; and my disappointment in my time management with my homework. So VWBug, Giraffe, and I went out drinking. That’s another story!

No, actually I don't know. That's why I asked.

By five o’clock on Thursday, I was more than ready to go home. The Joker and I work on the sixth floor, and we had to stop on the fifth and fourth floors before our elevator car was full. We even stopped on the third, but were out of space.

As we’re leaving the building, Athena and her friends are walking one direction, and I’m following (not really following, but by habit we’re walking in the same direction) the Joker towards our trucks. He then proceeds to say “You know, you can walk with Athena if you want.” REALLY!???!! Wow, I am so surprised! Are you giving me permission to walk with one of my best friends?! That is so kind of you! I am eternally grateful! How do I ever make this grand gesture up to you? Okay, so you caught all that sarcasm? Good. I told him that I tend to get quiet and awkward when I’m walking with them, which is very true. I don’t do well when meeting new people and I’m not very successful at joining in conversations, so I wouldn’t have said a word. Once I know someone, I don’t shut up and I tell them everything but until then, it’s not so enjoyable. I told him that my car was in the opposite direction they were walking and it didn’t really make sense to me. This must have satisfied him because he did stop talking then.

When he stops talking, I tend to believe something is wrong and to avoid this I ask him about his job. Works like a charm, I swear. He goes on and on about this, that, and the colour of the sky. He said that when employees call asking how to run the computer programs installed on their computers, he is expected to know. “It’s like just because you have a key to your truck, you know how to fix it.” Ah yes, always get back to the fact that I don’t have a clue how to do anything with Jack. Thanks for the reminder. I said that he was right and he said that he is always right. I called him “Mr. Cocky” and we said our goodnights. (This story does have a point, I promise!!)

Last night I was doing homework on my bed (in the exact same spot I am now, actually!) and my phone beeped. This, alone, is slightly unusual. I thought it might be a text message from Facebook or possibly my sister, but when I checked, well, it was the Joker. He and I haven’t text messaged in about eight months, maybe longer. Okay, so I admit that I did text him last Tuesday just to see if we were allowed to talk outside of work or if that was considered harassment. I thought it was funny!! He replies Wednesday night, while I’m at the Keith Urban concert he knew about and while he was working at his second (or possibly third?) job. “I think we can still talk”. Yeah, I know. Lamesauce. So last night, this was our conversation:

6:53 Joker - So am I too cocky for my own good :)
6:57 Grasshopper - What do you mean?
6:58 Joker - Lol you know :)
7:07 Grasshopper - I guess it depends on the situation. Didn't we discuss confident vs. cocky?
7:20 Grasshopper - Wait: the confidential mail? Lol
7:50 Joker - You mean the confidential male?

7:51 Grasshopper - Is that what its called now? Lol

9:04 Grasshopper - And no, you're not too cocky. :) There are days. And moments but overall... :p

The Joker does not use emoticons or “lol” in use text messages. If I knew what he had meant in the first place, I wouldn’t have asked! What was he talking about? Did he know I was involved on the Midol Joke? Is that what he meant? Can he see on my face what I don’t want to admit? Is that what he’s talking about? “Lol you know :)” What the heck? I know a lot of things, but I don’t know what you know so what is this about? I tried to not throw my phone across the room, with success actually! And then, for him to reply right away to not at all... Like what’s up with that?! Clearly, I need help. Blogging is just so much cheaper than therapy.

Well-Behaved Women Rarely Make History

Thursday morning I e-mailed Athena to vent. Stupid, petty things the Joker had done had really pissed me off. Dude. We park in the same spot every morning, but now you want to park closer to the building. WTF? Okay, I know. It’s a small thing. He didn’t come over to talk at all on Wednesday and it seemed like he was ignoring me. Something about his attitude on Wednesday just really seemed to strike a nerve with me. I started to think about the way he had been talking to me and I realized that I didn’t enjoy being talked at like I was five. It’s slightly disrespectful. Athena did have a plan, as she always seems to! The ultimate practical joke was about to go down.

Athena - I have always wanted to send the Zero some Midol
Grasshopper - DO ITTTTT!!!!!!! That would be hilarious Athena!
Athena - Well if I do, I’m not going in alone!
Grasshopper - Just tell me what you want me to do! They [the Joker and Zero] deserve this!
Athena - Alright, well we’ll need two chocolate bars, two bottles of Midol, and two brand new inter-office envelopes so it can’t be traced (We were planning on sending our surprises through the inter-department mail, and I work on the same floor as the Joker and Zero, but Athena doesn’t.)
Grasshopper - And a magazine, Cosmo or something. Do you want me to go to Shopper’s on my break?
Athena - Sure!
Grasshopper - Okay, I’ll call you when I get back.
And that was it. Plan SPM was in motion.

I asked the lady at Shopper’s to double-bag by supplies. We loaded it into the envelopes, and Athena carefully wrote their names on the outside. We even stamped “Confidential” just to be on the safe side. You never know with IT people. They’re weird and snoopy.

One thing you have to know about me is that I am incapable of lying. If Zero or the Joker had come up to me, (which thank goodness they didn’t! I would’ve died!) and asked me who the packages were from, they would know it was me and Athena. Guilt is painted all over my face, and then I start to laugh and no matter how many times I try, oh so hard, to remain stoic, I fail.

Mr. W picked up the packages (one of the IT managers) and I hid. Seriously! I had 483 invoices to file, so I managed to hide within the comfort of my file cabinets and I didn’t see either one of them until the end of the day. It was humorous when the only girl in IT, Ms IT, came over and asked me who dropped off the packages. Like I said, I couldn’t lie and she thought it was very funny. She said that the first person they guessed was Athena, but she swore herself to secrecy.

As the Joker and I were walking out, he didn’t mention a thing about the Midol Joke. Athena even joined us in the elevator, but nobody said anything. It was great!

Today I had to go into the dreaded IT room. It smells like man sweat in there, very disgusting. Anyways, I saw that Zero was proudly displaying his “medication” on the top of his desk. I couldn’t help myself and I asked if he had eaten his chocolate bar. He asked which chocolate bar, and I said “the one that came with the Midol.” Their manager, Hottie #3, and another co-worker, The A, were there too, and Hottie #3 says, “It was you?!!” I said that I may have had something to do with it (enter wink here!). Zero says, “Well tell Athena that I didn’t eat it.” I asked why not and he proceeds to tell me that they thought it may have been poisoned. I said that it was sealed!! What did we do? Poison it with ex-lax and then reseal it?? I promised that next time we’ll make some brownies and put a little surprise in there. The A and Hottie #3 found that very entertaining. I asked Zero if he had taken any medication and that he should. “You seem a bit off”; once again, they laughed.

Hottie #3 asked me after I left the stinky room who my “accomplices” were. I told him that I had to keep some secrets, but their initial guesses were on track. I admitted it was Athena and I and he was very impressed in our joking abilities. He said we had definitely stumped them and I was happy to take some of the credit!

Ms IT walked by later in the day and said that Athena and I had been found out. I said that I couldn’t take it any longer: we deserve the credit for the awesomeness!! When I told her that Zero hadn’t even eaten his chocolate bar, she said that the Joker threw his out. I couldn’t believe he would do that to a perfectly good chocolate bar! It was Mars! Caramel + chocolate = love!! She said that they thought it might have been poisoned and didn’t want to take any chances. CHOCOLATE. Need I say more?

I am very, very proud of Athena and I! Our joke had completely stumped the boys, and they got exactly what they deserve: a little taste of their own medicine!

Joe Cool?

I don’t get bored very easily, but sometimes my mind just needs a little break. My muscles don’t want to move so what do I do for excitement? Refresh the intranet page. Oh yeah, I’m cool like that. They used to have a “Quote of the Day” but replaced it with some health tip thing. As if I care about going “green”; I want the quote of the day back!

We even have this cool “Buy and Sell” feature and periodically (alright, once an hour!) I check on there to see if there are any cool concert tickets or whatnot. Well this afternoon, I checked and saw that the Joker was selling his rice rocket, noisemaker, motorbike thing. I immediately e-mailed Athena: was he going to sell his motorbike and follow KH around the world? No, she disagreed. The $4,000 he was asking for would never be enough to keep her happy. Ouch. She added that it was too bad he was selling his bike because “it was the only cool thing about him”. Double ouch.

As the Joker and I were walking out, I asked why he had decided to sell it. He said that he only put 1500 km on it this year because he’s too busy with housework and his driveway and the like. It had become a $4,000 paperweight and upon selling it, he can help pay off his dad’s car. He said that his dad bought a new car, but it’s in the Joker’s name and always will be or something like that. It’s his dad’s toy. Intrigued, I asked what kind of car it was. “A ’64 Chevelle Supersport”, he replies. I gasp. Instinctively and completely, I inhaled sharply and then I giggled. I thought he was joking! That is a sexy car; there is no way it is owned by the Joker! I told him that I would never picture him in a car like that, and he asked if I thought he was gay or something. I said “No! No! I don’t know; I just would never think...” I asked what colour it was because that is the only thing I would be able to understand anyways. The rest is gibberish. It is currently a burgundy colour (I was thinking red or black) but it is originally blue. He said that he and his dad have to install the motor (well yes, it is necessary there buddy) and it was going to be the wintertime job. I told him to bring it to work so I could see, but looking back I should have just demanded a ride in it (once the motor is in, of course).

I’m sorry Athena, but a Chevelle is way cooler than a motorbike can ever dream of being!! The Joker has taken me completely by surprise this time. Who would’ve thought he would be cool?

Don't Let Him Go

I e-mailed Athena this morning to catch her up on some of the latest happenings with the Joker and I. I hadn’t talked to her in a while and desperately needed her to knock some sense into me! With all of his niceness lately, I wasn’t sure what was going on and she put me right back in my place. No more daydreaming around here!

She called a few minutes later with some KH news. Through the grapevine, she told me that KH has quit her job at the City and will be living it up with her sugar daddy. Athena told me KH had a profile on sugardaddy.com and she had been talking with a married fellow who has swept her off of her feet. He’s going to build her a house and take care of her every need (and something about Mexico?) So she quit her job. This is all gossip, I’m sure. Really now, doesn’t that sound too good to be true! Take me with you KH!! I don’t know if she has actually quit her job or not yet, but this is too good to be made up. Athena said she found out on Thursday and thought that might be why the Joker had been so upset. When I told her that he had been really happy, well, that just makes no sense then!

Perhaps I should join KH and find me a sugar daddy! I could use a new house and some champagne! I diamond wouldn’t hurt either...

Seriously though, if this is true, she is going to be his mistress? I’ve never met the girl and shouldn’t judger her without knowing her, but it’s a trait I’m not proud of and have inherited from my dad. I have heard she’s “free” but how would you sleep at night knowing what you’re doing is so wrong? I guess one might sleep quite well. Four post bed. Jacuzzi tub. Satin sheets. Candlelight. It just might be the perfect lifestyle: a man who is not happy at home or has extra money to spend, meet woman in need of attention. Yes, I guess that might work out just fine.

I wonder if the rumour is true! Good for you KH! I just have a little advice for you, in the form of a song of course!

So you figure that you’ve got him all figured out,
He’s a sweet talkin stud
Who can melt a girl’s heart with his pout
He’s the kind of lover that the ladies dream about

He’s got plenty of cash
He’s got plenty of friends
He drives women wild
Then he drives off in a Mercedes-benz
He’s got a long wick with a flame at both ends
He’s hot

Bud don’t let him go
Just give him a chance to grow
Take it easy, take it slow
And don’t let him go

Don't let him go

Go Team Go

What could be more fun than sitting in the cold, wet, and windy weather for three hours with no one to talk to while watching your visiting friend’s team lose at a sport you hardly follow? Just about anything, I think!!! I went, I froze, they lost, and I left.

Okay, so maybe it wasn’t that bad, but they did lose. I had no idea where I was going, and once I got there, I had to pay to get in. Since I don’t carry cash, I have to now go and find an ATM machine which decides it hates me and charges a $1.75 convenience charge and drive back to the stadium to buy a ticket. (So maybe it was that bad.) Luckily no one spilled pop on me, but it was freezing! I was trying to watch the game, but I don’t know what is going on. I’m a hockey fan, through and through, and football is just not my thing. I followed best I could and the people sitting around me (one of them was T-Rex’s coach’s wife) kept talking about what was going on so that did help. In the end, they lost but I thought he played pretty well. All he had to do was run up to some guy and scream in his face, so that looked like it could’ve been fun. Maybe I’ll try out for a women’s team. Or not.

After the game I wanted to see him and talk for a minute, because that was why I was there. He came off of the field and I saw him talking to an older man. He smiled and waved once he saw me and I waved back. He talked to the older man for a minute (who turned out to be his dad but T-Rex didn’t introduce me) and he talked about coming down again this weekend to pick-up The Firefighter, T-Rex’s best friend. It sounded as though the older guy knew exactly what T-Rex was talking about, but it was all news to me. I tried to soak up as much info as I could, but I’ll probably talk to him later and find out what’s going on. Once his dad left T-Rex and I talked for a minute or so. He asked if I was heading home, and I said “Well yeah, where else would I go?” He thought I might be going to his sister’s, but I said that she didn’t make it to the game. He asked why and I said because from what I had understood, he hadn’t been talking to her lately so she didn’t come. Confused (a common emotion from my young friend), he said that he didn’t talk to her when I was hanging out with him, but he had tried to call her twice and she was sleeping. I found it odd that he even remembered hanging out with me since it has been well over a month now since I was up there. He seemed to forget everything that happened between us prior to that, but not my actual visit. Interesting. He said that he would hug me but he was all wet. I told him that I didn’t care and I got my hug anyways.

All in all, it was not a bad day. Well, minus the part where I actually had to WATCH the game; that did kind of suck. I got to see and talk to T-Rex (and I got my hug!) so I am glad that I went. I don’t know why I was making such a big deal out of the whole thing. It was just a football game and he wanted me there. Why should I not go? Of course, I probably won’t see him for a while now again, but that is probably a good thing. It’s best if we text and chat on MSN. He needs to have his drunken fun with his buddies and learn some hard lessons from a few girls. Then, he’ll know what works with women and what doesn’t. In a couple of years, I think we might be really good together. I wish I could say he was my best friend right now, but I think I’m going to need to kick the texting up a notch. If not, at least some really long Facebook messages. That way, I won’t bother him while he’s at work or at school but we can still keep in contact. I think that is a much better plan! Oh, I’m excited now!

Sometimes, life throws you a curveball. If you’re lucky, you won’t fumble or go offside. Wait. What sport are we talking about again? Ah yes, the sport of life.

Travel On

I guess you would be fair to say I haven’t had much luck with men. That would be completely justified, and I would not even bother arguing with you about that blatant truth. I’ve never been in a relationship, on a date, or felt wanted by a man. I know what I am looking for, and it’s not like my expectations are extremely high. I want an honest, sweet, caring, nice guy who would come over in the middle of the night and dry my tears. Someone to text me each morning, hold me during a movie, and send flowers to my work. It really does not take much to make me happy but it seems that this guy I am looking for does not exist.

My best friend, Athena, has decided to set me up with her younger brother. Oh goody. This ought to be fun! When I first heard about the plan, well, let’s just say I was less than thrilled. She had told me I was going to marry T-Rex, and have babies with him. What would you be thinking? “Oh shit. She thinks I’m so desperate I need her to set me up with her brother! This can’t be good.” Well, that’s what I was thinking! Although excited to meet this new boy, that was the problem. I had to meet this new boy, with an emphasis on meet! I do not do well with meeting new people. I am a very quiet person at first and I do not open up to my outlandish self until I feel very comfortable around them. Obviously, I thought she was crazy but I played along with her plan mindlessly because I knew it made her happy thinking she was this great matchmaker, although I had yet to speak to him!

One evening, June 19th in fact, I had a “friend suggestion” on Facebook. I stopped to look at who it was because it was very rare that I get friend request/suggestions! I was curious. Athena had suggested to T-Rex and I that we become Facebook friends. How cute! (Try to keep your lunch down; I know it’s tough.) Immediately, I sent her a message asking if she was feeling alright! I left my computer and went back to visiting with my family outside. I had my phone beside me so when she decided to reply I would get a text message from her. After an hour with no reply, I went back on Facebook and found a friend request! To my amazement, he too had heard the same fortune telling from Athena and we started talking immediately. Before long, we were text messaging and became electronically inseparable. (This is beginning to sound awfully familiar!)
Every little thing he did made me smile. We talked about all of our problems and he would always be there to listen, no matter how silly, stressful, or seemingly stupid my conversation topics seemed. He would text me first, usually by 11:00 a.m. when I went for my coffee break and as I was leaving work at 5:00, I would get another message asking how my day went. That is by far, the quickest way to my heart! We would talk for hours on end about anything and he was always so sweet and nice to me. He told me when he that when he came to visit (He is going to school three hours away, but his sister lives thirty minutes from my house and has an open door policy when it comes to him!), he was going to cook dinner for me. We were going to go out on an official date, and he was going to teach me how to shotgun a drink. Although the latter of these frightened me quite a bit, I began to conclude that he did, in fact, like me. This put me on cloud nine! A nice, sweet boy that likes me! Jackpot!

I started telling him about my passion for writing and he asked me to write something about him. This 18 year old boy, who I have never met but will one day date, would like me to write something about him. I was awestruck, first of all, that he wanted me to write something and also stumped because I had no idea what I wanted to tell him in my blog post. I was also unsure of where I stood with him, so I decided to play it safe; I went with the “best friend” card. I sent it to him let him read it. He told me that he didn’t know I felt that way about it and it gave him butterflies. T-Rex told me that he was going to read it whenever he was having a bad day to make him feel better. The next day he told me that he wished he could write something to make me smile like I had made him. I proceeded to tell him that “anything you write for me will make me smile”. Later that day, I got a Facebook message that put the biggest smile on my face! He called me his best friend and said he felt comfortable around me. “I know I feel that I can tell her anything and she won’t judge me. I think she feels the same way about me. But I have been there for her when she’s has been going through her problems and she has be there for me. I know every time I get a text message from her there is always a little grin or smile that goes on my face, no matter what mood I am in.” He proceeded to ask me if that made me smile, and I told him “It’s perfect!” So that’s where we stood: best friends. I knew that I had to go and visit him to see if we had as much chemistry as we seemed to and figure out if we were going anywhere.

A couple weeks later, I drove three hours by myself to meet him. When I was there, he acted as if I was his best friend. He treated me with the utmost respect and never crossed a line. We didn’t talk about it, but I kind of wanted that line to be crossed. I wanted him to tell me that he wanted to try to make this work, but knew it wasn’t the right time for us. Just for a mille-second, I wanted to cross the friend line and jump right back over again! I wanted him to hold my hand, cuddle with me, and maybe try to kiss me! I got three hugs, and a “Thanks for coming up” as I was leaving. Slightly disappointed, I bawled on my drive home. I was expecting this great realization or event when I was up there but instead I got three hugs. I guess my safe “best friends” card got in the way. Granted it was the first time we met, and I’m guessing he wanted to keep that card in play. I just wanted to feel wanted by him when I was there and I thought that was going to happen.

My trip didn’t go exactly how I had planned. For instance, when you call another girl to meet you and your friend-who-just-drove-three-hours-to-meet-you-for-the-first-time, somebody is going to be upset! It’s probably going to be the one who drove to meet you. I wanted to spend every waking minute with him, not him and some other chick. What does that make me? Chick 2? Chick 14? Chick 119,923? Where do I stand? Why do you have to call someone else to come and join us? Aren’t we having fun? Do you still want me to be here or would you rather I get in my car and leave you an hour from home? Luckily, I didn’t leave him. Instead, I text messaged his sister, who in turns begins text messaging T-Rex who found the entire scenario extremely funny. Really? He was getting great enjoyment of the insane amount of text messages he was happily ignoring. Meanwhile, I’m sitting there swearing like a sailor to his sister! Great fun it was not.

It is very difficult to have electronic relationships with people. Please, avoid it at all costs! I have had one too many, and that was part of the reason I felt I had to go and meet him. I want to be, at the very least his friend, and it is challenging to do that when you are three hours apart and both very busy people. We had a blast while I was there and wouldn’t change a thing about what happened, even though my great event didn’t take place.

When I got home, I asked him if we were going anywhere or were better as friends. He told me that a) he didn’t want me to be mad because I was “nice and everything”; b) the distance would be really challenging and he was going to be very busy in the fall; and c) he wanted to keep talking to me and hoped we could still be friends. He said that the trip didn’t change anything. Wow. That is a lot to take in all at once! Even from that, I still don’t know how he feels! Does that mean he wants to make it work but knows the distance is too much? Is that an “it’s not you, it’s me, but it’s really you”? Am I not what he expected to meet? I was myself the entire time. What did I do wrong? I know that we are too far apart to make this work right now, but I wanted him to tell me that! Still, after talking about this with the Wise One, I believe he does still like me. Do you think I’m crazy after all of this to believe that? His sister and I are going to give him the benefit of the doubt: he is only 18 and the friend thing probably got in the way. Wise One is still convinced we will be married. I guess we shall see!

Since coming home, things have seemed to change. Wednesday, Thursday, and Friday I have text messaged T-Rex first and yesterday I did not text him at all, but I didn’t get a text from him either. I do know that he isn’t home now either; he is visiting his friends in his hometown. Once again, the benefit of the doubt! He will be stopping by to visit his sister tomorrow on his way home. I told him that since he will be going through my town, he could always stop by if he wanted. I’ll be home! He said he would see how it goes, so I will wait.

A sweet, nice, caring guy is at my fingertips. Now I just have to find a way to make him mine. This should be an interesting journey!